Whether
you have time to plan ahead or you’re just getting home from the
hospital after major surgery, it’s essential to organize a group of
friends and family willing to assist you during your recovery. Maggie
Lichtenberg offers advice on what to assign your home team.
It’s essential to organize a Home Team before you go in for heart
surgery, even if you have little time before your surgery to plan it.
On the other hand, if you have just gotten home from the hospital,
don’t worry it’s not too late. A Home Team is a group of friends and
family who are willing to assist you in your recovery following your
surgery. Make a list of up to fifteen people, family and friends (but
not your primary caregiver) who would be glad – even honored – to be
called to help out. Pick a leader among these friends and engage her or
him to contact the others about the tasks ahead. Set up a revolving
schedule of assignments for your first three to four weeks at home.
Your Primary Caregiver Has The Most Important Role
Who will your primary caregiver be; your spouse, your partner, a
friend, or another family member? In my new book, The Open Heart
Companion: Preparation and Guidance for Open-Heart Surgery Recovery the
following scenario is explained to help you better understand their
importance: Suddenly your caregiver, your close personal ally, has the
extended responsibility for all previously shared arrangements –
nursing aid, household tasks, transportation, medical and social plan
coordination. It can become overwhelming and too much for one person.
That is why it is essential that you line up a supportive Home Team to
pitch in. Your primary caregiver needs assistance and taking care of
too. Once you are home and recovering, he or she is now “on” 24/7. He
or she also needs continuing acknowledgment, appreciation and love from
you. Plan to regularly express your gratitude. Find out how your loved
one is feeling – every day. Though sometimes you won’t feel like it,
remember to smile, and show you care and appreciate all that is being
done for you.
Five basic tasks to assign to your Home Team
1. Dinner nightly
Some friends will like to prepare a home cooked meal for both patient
and caregiver, while others can pick up a heart healthy take-out meal.
Since the reality of landing back home means the primary caregiver has
antenna focused on you continuously, your caregiver loved one will
appreciate the sit-down break at dinner time.
2. Buddy system
During the many hours and days of convalescence, neither patient nor
primary caregiver wants to feel isolated at home. Anticipate a buddy
system in advance. Is there a friend who has been though open-heart
surgery who will agree to check in with the patient regularly? Is there
someone that the heart patient can call spontaneously? Many basic
questions can be answered this way, by a friend or family member.
Naturally, any substantial recovery question requires picking up the
phone and calling your designated medical professional. Maybe you know,
or know of, a former heart patient who also is a medical professional?
Arrange chat times (perhaps twice weekly) with him or her. Primary
caregiver and patient should also plan regular phone time with a best
friend independently, to be free to let their hair down to tell it like
it is.
3. Running errands
Who – friend or neighbor – would be willing to be counted on to run to
the pharmacy or to deposit or pick up laundry or dry cleaning? How
about someone who will shop for staples at the supermarket or buy a box
of thank-you notes? Recruit a list of volunteers beforehand. It’s
critical to have this in place to enable you to focus on getting well.
4. Housekeeping
In the hospital take-home instructions, there are very specific
physical directives that must be honored while the sternum (breastbone)
is healing. You are not to lift more than five to ten pounds for four
to six weeks. As well, you are to avoid pushing/pulling activities with
your arms, and also avoid heavy one-armed lifting for three months.
This eliminates carrying groceries, carrying a toddler, vacuuming,
shoveling snow, mowing the lawn, raking leaves – even wiping up a
kitchen counter with a sponge can be challenging in the first couple of
weeks. It is best to schedule others for regular housekeeping duties
for at least four to six weeks and/or consider hiring a house cleaner
for the short term.
5. Chauffeuring
An open-heart patient may not resume driving for six to eight weeks –
until the sternum is fully healed. Because you don’t want to risk
re-injuring the sternum should a passenger airbag need to be deployed,
you might be advised to ride in the back seat using the shoulder seat
belt. That said, you can ride in a car as soon as you’re home – to a
medical appointment, to the store, to eat out. However, all these
outings become a lot of driving for the primary caregiver, so line up
chauffeur volunteers.
Recovering from heart surgery can be challenging, but with these tips
and more tips on planning ahead found in The Open Heart Companion you
can ensure that your recovery will go smoothly.
Maggie Lichtenberg, PCC, a recent open-heart surgery thriver, is an
open heart coach to heart patients and their loved ones, a professional
speaker, and frequently published author. To subscribe to her free
online newsletter, Heart To Heart, send a blank email message to
HeartToHeart-On@zines.webvalence.com. To learn more about Maggie's free
phone support group and other programs go to www.openheartcoach.com. Article is free to reprint as long as author’s bio remains intact.